Annie, with her abnormal extra-sensory intuition, understood Marty the best of all. She went out shopping with him while Mike was taking evening classes to gain his final credits so he could graduate. She graciously walked arm in arm with him at the mall so people would think they were a couple, and he smiled shyly to see the admiring glances cast their way by men and ladies alike. Despite her solicitous posing, he could tell there was something on her mind, and waited for her to reveal it. Annie contained her emotions about as well as a rusty bucket holds water. Over their Big Macs, chocolate milk shakes, and greasy fries on a plastic table, she confided to Marty in sisterly tones. Here it comes, he thought, bracing himself for another dose of meaningless platitudes.
“With all these guys going off to college, Marty, (sob) you’ll have no trouble finding someone.” She had obviously been reading his mind, he realized, and pushed away the remains of his artificial meal. He had been so wrapped up in his own melancholy that he’d failed to notice Annie was crying.
“Oh no, Annie, what’s wrong?” He knew all of a sudden it was something other than his lack of a love life that was making her sad. The realization that other people could suffer and have deep feelings, too, made the half-eaten hamburger feel heavy in his stomach.
“You’re like a brother to me, Marty. You’re the only one I can trust.” She sniffled and sucked noisily on the last of her milk shake; barely holding her emotions together. “I’m pregnant,” she confided softly, then let loose a wrenching cry that turned heads in their direction.
Shocked beyond reason, he barely resisted the urge to say, “Well it wasn’t me,” but instead opened his heart to compassion in a way it had never blossomed before. She had a new life within her body! A miracle! So why wasn’t she happy? Annie sobbed into the crook of her sleeve, trying to avoid the curious stares from those around her. Inspired, Marty took her arm and courteously offered, “Come on, let’s go for a walk.” He pulled her towards the exit. Outside, he instinctively headed for the trees, even though they were just some dusty, confused acacias in concrete pots. “Don’t worry,” he soothed, “This is fantastic news!”
Free from the prying eyes, Annie released all her pent-up emotions. “No, it’s not!” she bawled, “Mike isn’t gonna want me to have a baby, he told me so many times, but I just forgot to take my pill, you know? It’s not my fault!” She buried her face in his rock & roll t-shirt.
Marty again stifled the reflexive sarcastic retort that came to mind (even though it truly was at least half her fault), and put his arm around her with sincere comfort. “Don’t worry, Annie, you’ll be a terrific mom –”
“What?” she jumped as if stung by a bee. “No way! I have to get an abortion! My dad will kill me and Mike both, and he’ll go to prison again!” Her eyes revealed she had said too much, and dove back into the logo of AC/DC.
“Warning! Warning! Approaching alien territory!” The red lights flashed in Marty’s skull, and sirens wailed on the bridge. He calmly turned them off, and saw with crystal clarity the truth on his mental screen: there’s no way Annie is going to kill her baby while I’m around.
“Annie, wait.” He rubbed her back and arms in resuscitation, as if bringing life back into her body. “Just wait. Don’t do anything yet, okay? Let me talk to Mike. You’re sure about this, right? You’ve been to see a doctor?” She nodded. “Okay, don’t do anything yet. You’ve got time to think this over, okay?” His lips were repeating inane banalities while his crisis center was handling multiple incoming missile vectors. I’ve got to find a way to save her baby, he gritted his teeth. It has to live!
Marty talked the situation over with Marge, who got out of bed long enough to give him a huge hug. He could see in her eyes that she knew everything, and it was all okay. She advised him to have a heart to heart talk with Annie’s dad. It was astounding to Marty how his mom could be so wise and open-hearted with everyone but herself. He drove over the hill to Fairfax and had a long discussion with Karl, who didn’t actually kill anyone, but instead complimented him on his courage and maturity. The German sculptor’s blowtorch eyes blazed with the vigor of one who ardently protects his family. Emboldened by the unexpected acceptance of a strong man he admired, Marty ventured a foolish resolve that if Mike wouldn’t take care of the baby, he would. Karl softened for the first time since he’d known him, and laid a calloused hand on the young man’s arm. “You and Mike are both like sons to me,” he smiled through his beard. “There was never a baby who will receive more love.”
And so it was that everyone knew Annie was pregnant except Mike, who was the unwitting cause of the sudden surge in sentimentality just before graduation night. “Why are you crying?” he questioned his girlfriend, “You should be glad school is over!” She wanted to wait until after the ceremony to tell him, but he kept pushing and wheedling for details while they were all packing their caps and gowns to drive over the hill. Finally, Annie couldn’t take it anymore, and blurted with exasperation that he was going to be a father! Stunned, he opened and closed his mouth repeatedly like a fish, and fumbled with his jacket to try and find his cigarettes. Marty gripped him on the shoulder in support, and kindly guided him to sit down on the couch. Mike reached for a beer bottle on the coffee table, but it was as empty as his eyes.
“We’re going to be late.” Marge walked in, spoiling a momentous present moment by worrying about the future. She was probably concerned about running into Good Ol’ Dad in the gymnasium, where the diplomas would be handed out. All the way over the hill, Mike slumped sullenly in the front seat of Annie’s Bronco, and silently chain-smoked his Marlboros till they were all gone. The graduating class was large that year, and the place was packed, all the way to the top row of the bleachers. The graduates sat near the front, and fidgeted with their tassels while chatting animatedly with their friends in other rows, ignoring the people seated next to them in alphabetical order.
The seniors had a fascinating prank planned, and Marty couldn’t wait to see how it turned out. A large bag of marbles was passed up and down the rows, and they all took one and concealed it in their hand. When the pomp and circumstance started to play, they rose by row and marched to the front, waiting for their name to be called before striding confidently across the stage. Some waved to family, or raised their arms in victory, but everyone was congratulated by Mrs. Dreadnaught, the principal, as she handed them their diplomas. As they shook hands, each former student discreetly transferred their marble to the principal’s palm. At first she was confused by the odd gifts, and hesitantly put them in her suit pocket. Then she slowly began to understand, as her pockets bulged noticeably, with dozens of graduating seniors still in line. She was running out of pockets! She turned red, and began transferring handfuls of marbles to Mr. McIntosh, who had come to investigate the problem. He glanced accusingly at Marty, who was near the end of the line, as marbles dropped noisily to the stage and rolled around. Mrs. Dreadnaught had accepted over 200 marbles by then, taking the joke in stride, and all the people who could see what was going on were chuckling at her discomfort.
When Bart accepted his diploma, he pulled a Frisbee out from under his gown and hurled it – seemingly at random – all the way across the gym. It skimmed over the raised backboards, through all the wires and light fixtures, and traveled the length of the court into the waiting hands of his brother, Tom, who was seated in the opposite bleachers. It was an amazing act of dexterity that most of the graduating class recognized, and some faces were wet with tears. Tom grinned sheepishly with his lopsided face while his family and those around him applauded.
When Marty’s turn came, Mr. McIntosh tried to give him a stern look, then shook his hand and spoke in his ear, “I know you were responsible for this, you rascal! I’m gonna miss you!” Marty smiled with satisfaction while collecting his diploma, understanding for the first time how different this gathering would have been if he’d been successful in killing himself. He felt suddenly ashamed and flushed, which others interpreted as embarrassment, but inside he wanted to throw up. He felt dizzy, and had to concentrate to make it back to his chair. After all the graduates tossed their hats into the air, and were released into the world like baby salmon, Marty wondered how many of them would have missed him.
“Daniel.” She nodded primly, barely holding herself together with shock. It was the first time they had been in the same room in six years. She stiffly bestowed upon her son a long, drawn-out hug so she wouldn’t have to look at her ex-husband. Then Mike arrived with Annie, and they shared embraces with Marty and his sisters, but when he looked around, G.O.D. had disappeared. He simply couldn’t endure so much love and familiarity, and went home to sort through coins.
— Bad Company